Failing is an inevitable part of life unfortunately and it can be hard to cope with. Let’s be honest, it straight up sucks when you work so hard for something just to have it come crashing down.

If you let it then failure can start to consume you and all of the sudden every decision you make is based on whether you might fail or not. But you can’t let that fear of failure stop you from living out your dreams.

How to take control of failure:

It is important to have a good mind set when it comes to failure. Instead of looking at the negative side of things, train your mind to focus on the positive.

Failure is just another opportunity to TRY AGAIN but from a new perspective. You now know exactly what doesn’t work in order to succeed. Cross plan A off your list and move forward.

Also, try to redefine what failure means to you. This goes hand in hand with looking for the positive. Turn the negative into a positive

Ex.  Instead of “Wow, I failed and now I have to start completely over”

 Try “Well I have a delay in this project but now I can use this time to become an expert in this area”

Redefining the word failure will allow to STOP cringing everytime you hear that word!

Tips to Help With the Fear of Failure:  

1. Don’t let failure become your identity:

Failing isn’t who you are as a person, so why would you let that determine your next steps. You are a person working towards bettering your life or maybe even someone else’s life.

2. Stop worrying about what other people think of you:

Most of the time people aren’t afraid of failing, rather afraid of what other people will think about their failure. If you love something and you’re passionate about it, then why would you let someone come between you.

Rachel Hollis talks about a quote that hit home for her, and it did the same for me. So I’m going to share it with you in hopes that it resonates for you as well. It goes something like this, “Other people’s opinions of you are none of your business.”

This quote really got me thinking… someone else’s opinion of me actually has NOTHING to do with me. That is THEIR personal thought and I wasn’t put on this world to please everyone.

3. Accept and learn from your mistakes: don’t dwell on the fact that your first attempt didn’t work. Take light in knowing that you now know what doesn’t work for you.

There was a man who lost his job in 1831.

Lost the election for Illinois State Legislature in 1831

Lost the election for Illinois House Speaker

But, in 1860 he was elected for United States President. That man was Abraham Lincoln. He had many failures throughout his lifetime but he never let those loses dictate his life. He tried over, and over, and over again.

Everyone has setbacks in their career, it’s your reaction that determines the rest.

Steps to take after a ‘Setback’:

  1. Write a list of the actions that led up to the setback
  2. Analyze each action and how they affected your outcome
  3. Put together a new plan of action — use your reflections from step 2 to create your new plan.

Inspiring Quotes:

“Failure is success in progress” ~ Albert Einstein

“Failure is an important part of your growth and developing resilience. Don’t be afraid to fail” ~ Michelle Obama

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all. In which case, you’ve failed by default.” ~J.K Rowling

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” ~ Thomas Edison

“Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end.” ~ Denis Waitley

Failure doesn’t always have to be a negative part of the process. You get to choose how you want to let failure in and choose how it affects your life.

Good luck with future “failures” 😉


Phylisity is a 21 year old obsessed with makeup, fitness, and health. She started getting interested in beauty when she was 14 years old. She watched every makeup tutorial on youtube and instantly fell in love with the process. Phylisity was a competitive cheerleader for 15 years so fitness was always a part of her life. Now that she no longer cheers, she loves weight training and spin classes!

Her blog, Allure Overload is where she helps you with all things beauty, health, and fitness related. You can find makeup reviews, health related articles, and random pieces from her life. You can also connect with her on Instagram @allureoverload.